Google vs. Human: People should always win

My recent loss of access to all things Google thanks to some hackers has me thinking about what it is Google is and is not.

Some background: In mid-February my Gmail account was hacked (earlier post: I’m in Google Hell: A Cautionary Tale) and it took multiple attempts and 20 days for me to get the account back - minus all my contacts and much of my old mail.

During that time I had no access to Google+, Blogger, Google Docs etc. etc. It got me thinking about Google as a customer-centered company.

The company’s informal corporate slogan "Don't be evil" is so-often-quoted that it leaves the impression that all that Google does is for the good (and by default the good of its users).

However, my recent experience in Google customer hell would tell a different story. That this company has not direct human interface with its customers says two things to me:

1. Google prefers not to deal personally with the very people who make its business success possible

2. Google is run by people who are possibly uncomfortable dealing with people in any way other than electronic means (email, for example).

So, given that, here are some things that happened to me contrasted as what Google did and what a reasonable Human would do:

Google: When I went looking for information after my account was hacked, sent me to the Account Recovery Page. This page invited me to enter my email address to be taken to another page where I could answer a series of questions including some most of us would struggle with (The exact date you opened your Gmail account? The exact date you opened another Google-related account?)
Human: Send people to a page where they can have a live chat with someone who can likely resolve their issue on the spot.

Google: After six business days (not the 3-5 promised) I was asked via email for additional information to prove who I was.
Human: Use a Google search to see what comes up on the person contacting Google. If their Google account is high in the results (as mine was) and that account points straight to my Gmail email address that should be proof enough that I’m who I say I am. But wait, if the Google search turns up dozens of results and all point to me that should also be enough proof.

Google: Has human beings who answer the general customer service number – (650) 623-4000 whose main role seems to be to drive people back to filling out online forms.
Human: Have empowered human beings answering the phone who can actually resolve customer problems.

Being human would seem to be in Google’s best interest since it is humans that use the company’s services, provide the raw material for the business model and will decide today, tomorrow or sometime in the future if they want to be a part of Google’s online ecosystem.

I’m not sure what it means for a corporation to be “human,” but I have a sense it includes putting people and their issues first and living up to the slogan “Don't be evil.”

Related post
I’m in Google Hell: A Cautionary Tale

I’m in Google Hell: A Cautionary Tale

Originally posted Feb. 29, 2012 on Social Media Today because I did not have access to my Blogger account because by Gmail account had been hacked and the password changed.

UPDATE: My Gmail account was returned to me after four attempts by me to do all that Google asked and 20 days of waiting. A follow up blog post will be here soon.

Now to the original post …

You’re breaking my heart Google.

You don’t write.

You don’t call.

Honestly it’s starting to feel like we may have parted ways for good. And truthfully this makes me sad.

At one time I was one of your biggest fans. In media interviews, in classroom lectures and at conferences I would joke that one day the Earth might be called Planet Google.

But, now two weeks have passed since my Gmail account was hacked. I know the exact time too. I was accessing my Gmail from my smartphone at 11:11 a.m. EST on Feb. 15 when I suddenly could not send a reply to an email.

Since that time I’ve done everything you’ve asked: I’ve filled out the Account Recovery form and patiently waited the 3-5 days you said it would take. But it took six days for you to get back to me and that was only a request for more information. I obliged in less than 30 minutes.

Again you told me it might be 3-5 business days. And yet …. A week later here I sit: without my email and without any indication that you even care.

And lest you think I’m some kind of passive-aggressive type who is just meekly sitting around waiting … I did try calling your general customer service number – (650) 623-4000 (press "0" to speak to a live human being who will helpfully tell you there is nothing they can do and be sure to fill out the online Account Recovery form).

So, on the eve of your (Google’s) rollout of its new privacy policy, here in a nutshell is why most of us should reconsider using so many of your (Google services) … or as I call it …

Five Degrees of Google Hell

1. Google’s online customer service is not helpful and it is exceedingly frustrating to navigate. If there were any justice in the world Google’s founders would be sentenced to spend a day trying to figure out how to recover their Gmail accounts.

2. Once your Gmail account is hacked you’ve essentially lost access to all the other connected Google services. Goodbye Google+. So long Google Docs. No Blogger access for you. Etc. etc.

3. Once the hackers have your address they start sending out pleas for money with some bizarre story about you being trapped overseas and in need of money. This sparks a huge round (in my case hundreds) of messages on social media and via the phone to make sure I’m aware my account has been hacked. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for the concern, but for two days I was buried while responding to people.

4. Then there are other uses you have inadvertently tied your email to. For example: Want to do your taxes but can’t remember the password for the online service? Oh well can’t request a reminder because, you guessed it, that email will go to the account you cannot access.

5. If you also have a secondary business where the email is forwarded to your Gmail (for convenience) you’re also sunk. Those emails are merrily going to an unavailable account. Why not reset the forwarding? Well you can’t if you don’t have access to both accounts that are tied to, you guessed it, Google.

Basically Google, you have your hooks in too much of my life – something I realized too late.

I once trusted you and believed in you.

Now … On the day before Google rolls out a big shake up in its privacy policies this might be a good time to rethink your dependence on Google and learn from my mistake and avoid Google Hell!